Tuesday, May 25, 2010

its official

i have cfrd. im pretty bummed so anyone out there with cfrd i need to know all the details tips and tricks. give me all your info i really need some help.

hope everyone had a good monday

Saturday, May 22, 2010

first night with my machine

don't I look pretty and do you see my cookie

Saturday, May 15, 2010

bed time

I'm laying in bed listening to my feeding machine the first time In months and I feel ashamed I feel defeated I feel relief. As much as I hate it it has the potential to help me do something I can't do. It doesn't seem fair to hate on it. Secretly I'd like to throw it against the wall. Well its not a secret anymore. We have a love hate relationship. (Sigh) my life is getting weirder. The beauties of cf

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

i have been hiding

Its probably no surprise i have been absent.

Its kinda on purpose i must confess. It seems like everyone is moving on in there life, and i don't mean getting new doctors or new place; i mean they are dyeing.
death. It goes hand in hand with life.
but i don't like death.

Its always present in my thoughts. Seeing others I admire pass away and move along to a better place. Its an awful year we are loosing some of our best. The strongest are getting weak the living aren't living anymore.

I don't know how we all do it mourn another death of someone who looks like me, or maybe its your child; niece or nephew. Whoever the person is it hurts.

My Dad asked me why do i read so many stories and how do i handle the loss of another Cyster or Fibro?
well honestly its another person to meet up with in heaven; its someone who is in my thoughts and occasionally if I'm lucky i see them in my dreams. Its weird how i don't know them but at the same time i know them on a different level. Its Cystic Fibrosis that ties us all together. Whether were here on earth or watching in heaven we still have that connection. CF.

SO i have been hiding quietly reading and mourning the ones we lost. I cry for them and there families I pray for their pain and i rejoice they are at peace. I hope someday when its my time everyone shows the support to the ones i love because thats what makes our community one of the strongest.
with love and hopes of good health for all

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